The Main Prospect The Baltimore Ravens Must Select In 2026 NFL Draft (April Fools Edition)

Welcome to the top 16 of the NFL Draft, Ravens fans. It is a weird time for this franchise, and there is a gigantic unknown heading into the month of April. With the NFL Draft almost here, the Ravens have to prepare to draft a player. While researching a lot of things made no sense, prospects were left off the list. After digging in the archives, the Ravens have a prospect that they must select here.

The Biggest Team Need For The Baltimore Ravens

Well there biggest need should be dropping the nuke and purging all pieces. Last season proved they are not winning with this core, but it’s clear the franchise thinks they can win with this team. Especially in extending Mark Andrews for some reason, I seriously don’t understand why. Heck, the Ravens tried trading for Maxx Crosby, but backed out of the deal because they found their guy at this spot.

With The 14th Pick In The 2026 NFL Draft, The Ravens Select –  S Scott “Raven” Levey (University of Delaware)

Haha, you guys knew that we had a plan once we screwed the Raiders out of Maxx Crosby. Like Vince McMahon would say in this situation Raiders Screwed Raiders. We wanted to keep our pick for one reason: the moment this player became available on our boards. That man is who they call Raven, aka Scott Levey. 

If there is one thing to describe him, it is hardcore. This man can do anything crazy, from chair shots, going through tables, and almost cutting the power off at WrestleMania 17. Heck, there were even rumors he cut off the power during Super Bowl XLVII (47). It’s never been proven, and looking at the device settings, they were low. This man will do anything to get the win, and we’re happy about it.

Now there are a few concerns with this selection. The first is that he’s 61 years old. Look, George Blanda played to an old age, too; it’s not hard for Raven to do that. The second issue is that he hasn’t played football, but has a history of watching games with Steve “Mongo” McMichael during their WCW days. A third issue is the drug issues he dealt with during his time ECW and WCW, but he is clean today. We don’t have to worry about PED violations.

This man is the safety that we have long been looking for. Like in his promos, he wants the opponents and others to feel his pain. Well, he’s got the opportunity to inflict that pain by tackling players. The promos he can cut will be golden for our social media view counts all over the virtual world.

Ravens Fans Got Their New Face At Defense & A Hardcore Player

The Ravens finally got a face of the defense in Scott Levey. He is so talented that he’s better than Earl Thomas and Ed Reed combined. This man knows what it is like to go into war as a Raven. Edgar Allen Poe would be a tremendous fan of his if he were alive today, with how dedicated Levy is to the Ravens brand. It’s not an if, but when this gets announced, and it will be the most accurate and lock-pick of the draft.

Here is a fascinating fact about this draft choice for the future and present. It was all a dream, an imagination, and a joke. That’s right, look at those calendars, everybody. Happy April Fools, everybody. On a side note, I hope Scott “Raven” Levey is doing okay, as he has been dealing with serious health issues.